Never Ever Dull
With every conversation, I always seem to end with "Never a dull moment"....our lives are rich, complex, and beautiful stories. Join me in laughing about everyday things and appreciating life-bumpy roads and all.
They gather criss-cross applesauce on our worn-out classroom carpet. Routines are in place as I pull out my book. I share about Moses listening to God and being given the commandments on stone tablets. My environment-loving child bursts out with “Praise the Lord! It wasn’t plastic!” Our class erupts in laughter and smiles, because we know this child. Saving the world by recycling is what’s most important to her. That’s the lens through which she sees everything. Each day, you’d find a kid teetering over a trash can with an item, trying to decide if it should be recycled or not. Lights were turned off as much as possible, little paper was used, and far less was tossed in the trash cans. We all became conscious of how we can save the Earth because of this one student. Fresh perspectives change our views by pivoting us to see a situation through a different lens. What life circumstance may need an adjustment in how you are viewing it? Are you willing to listen to it and follow through with action?
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“Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.” Matthew 7:24-25 (ESV)
“Yes, ma’am. You need to decide because we can’t come back in to get you. It’s too dangerous.” I still remember the police officer’s words. Flood waters were rising beneath my home, approaching more than six feet. When my bungalow was constructed over one hundred years ago, the builders dug out a huge area and created supports made of roughly cut rock cemented together. I’d never paid much attention to these pillars but spent my time renovating and decorating my home. I should have paid more attention. The water filled my cellar like a giant bathtub, and I wondered if the stone pillars would topple. You may not have experienced a flood, but you may have anxiety and fear that rise, seeping into your heart and thoughts. What am I doing with my life? Why is this relationship so shaky? How do I juggle all that’s expected of me? Life’s stresses can weaken us like walls that are falling down or crumbling. We wrestle desperately to keep everything looking strong but it’s exhausting. It just comes down to this: What is holding you up when everything is falling down? “Do not fear, for I am with you.” (Isaiah 43:5 NASB) Allow His promises to wash over you and comfort you, giving you rest from all that tugs at your heart. “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you…. For I am the Lord your God.” (Isaiah 43:2-3 ESV) After the police officer’s words, I walked to my cellar to determine if the supports were in jeopardy. The water had risen in the last hour, but the pillars stood firm, not budging. Friends, we all face challenges, but we have God. With each challenge, we need to return to what’s holding up our faith and remember how faithful our God has been and will be in our lives. Stand firm on His promises and rest. Are you wrestling with stress? Anxiety? Fear? Remind yourself to rest, simply rest, on the pillars of His promises. He will never fail you. Father, thank you for Your promises that You will never leave us or fail us. Help me to give up wrestling and begin resting. When I feel that my life is giving way to fear, anxiety, and stress, let me remember You are my Support. “It will be ok,” she would murmur as she finished up washing my hair. I’d feel for the terry cloth towel and wrap it pretzel-twisty style around my head. Flopping the leftover towel across my shoulder, I would retreat, so glad that the ordeal of shampooing my hair was completed. I still remember the turquoise formica counters and the white porcelain sink which had to be cleared of the dishes my siblings and I would leave behind. It’s not hard to retrieve these memories, because I’m reliving it now. Again. But it’s different. I notice her push her walker to her side and hear her ask if the water is the right temperature. I reassure that it's just right as I encourage her to place her head near the faucet. I massage in the blue shampoo that she keeps by the sprayer for my visits. She talks and talks, loving the time that’s given only to her instead of attending to her bills, stocking her fridge, and fixing items on her repair list. I’ve learned to slow down and let her chatter, realizing how precious these moments are and how I should have slowed down years before. Yet, my life was full raising my own and trying to keep everything spinning. But was it that busy? Do we all keep our own agendas at the forefront of our lives? Why do we do this? I ponder a lot as I listen to her discuss the new pastor that she’s heard all about and who hasn’t even moved to town yet and how her friend brings in her mail every day after she visits the grocery store in the mornings and why she has to visit the store every morning is an ongoing mystery. We finish up our routine and I wrap her hair up with the terry cloth towel. She asks if I have everything ready to curl her hair to finish up my salon treatment. I watch with misty eyes as she maneuvers that walker back into the room where she carefully sits down ready for the next step in getting her hair "fixed up." I smile and pray that God gives me just a little bit more time. Time that will allow me now to say over and over to her that "it will be ok" and that I'm right here for her. New day Hot coffee Start computer Google news Website appears Perplexed thoughts Quickly delete Move on Next day Hot coffee Start computer Google news Website appears Mind wonders Why It’s There Call husband Rushes home At table Sit down Sideways glances Wringing hands “I’m exploring” Brain swirls Room spinning Sick stomach Stilted conversation Lingering questions Veil lifting False honesty Quickly exits Left alone At table Grabbing chair Holding on To What I Really Don’t know Weeks pass Months pass Awkward holidays Holding on Counselor appointments Hiding out Not sharing So hurtful Can’t tell Don’t Want Anyone To Know This truth Him: Strong Christian Church leader Promise Keeper Discipled men Family groups Men’s studies Proud father All lies Façade built Everyone clueless Public image Meant everything Says he Knew I Was easy To deceive Trying reconciliation More counseling Building trust Sharing more Peeling layers Pouring out Digging deep Spiritual renewal Raw emotions Seeking hope More revealed But My Gut Tells Me It’s Not Everything Shaky hands Take paper Call number Of Steve Investigator suggested By attorney Who had An inkling But I Didn’t Want To Go That Route Send children To friend Steve comes Takes computers I wait For results Pleading with God to Be with Me Steve calls So Much Worse Than Ever Imagined What’s next? Dig deeper Ask God For Help His guidance His leading Don’t Want To Face Failure Papers filed Standing alone In courtroom Knowing this Was The Only Answer Step outside Breathe in Breathe out Closer to God Knowing He’s With Me And Feels This Gut Wrenching Ache Questions rush Parenting four? All alone? Financially stable? What will People think? Days, weeks, Months, years So different Stronger, confident Knowing God Never left Me And He Remains By My Side |
AuthorFun-loving mom to 4 kids and 1 big puppy. Fifth grade teacher of amazing little people who have never ending things to share with me. Love to discuss Jesus, diy projects, and life. Trying to keep it simple: Love Jesus, love people. Archives
December 2021
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